Low self esteem is seeing yourself as unworthy, unlovable, unacceptable or incompetent. These beliefs create negative thoughts that affect your behavior and even life choices. Low self esteem affects all of us from time to time. However, if your self worth is so low you will even struggle to properly function. The good news is there are ways to build up your self esteem, it won’t happen overnight but with the right mindset you can take steps towards changing the way you feel about yourself.
So what is self esteem?
Self esteem is the opinion people have of themselves, your self worth, your personal value. In other words, it means how much you like yourself. Your self esteem involves things like how you look, how you feel, how you manage your personal successes and failures. People with good self esteem are likely to feel positive about their abilities and enjoy more life.
And how do you start overcoming low self esteem?
Low self esteem often begin in childhood, teachers, friends, siblings or parents send positive or negative message about ourselves. Maybe you find it difficult to live up to other people’s expectations of you or to your own expectations. Additionally, stress and difficult life events can have negative impact on our self esteem. To overcome low self esteem is to change how we feel emotionally about ourselves. The first step is to change the belief that we are not good enough which can be linked to how we look, how smart we are, money or lack of confidence. People with low self esteem hide from challenging situations in the short term it makes them feel safe but in the long term, it teaches you that the only way to cope is by avoiding things.
Here are some tips to overcome low self esteem
1 Be kind to yourself
Be less hard on yourself. Think of what advice you would give to someone in your situation. We often give better advice to others than to ourselves. Whenever you feel like criticizing yourself, remember to be kind to yourself.
2 Challenge yourself
It is normal to feel nervous and afraid from time to time but don’t let those feelings prevent you from trying new things. Set yourself some new challenges and achieve them, it will increase your self esteem. Read also How to smash your goals
3 Challenge your negative self beliefs
Your negative sense of who you are might be outdated or simply untrue or has been passed on to you by parents friends or ex partners. Try to remind yourself you are a good person, worthy of respect and love like every human being. It is your story, rewrite it.
4 Take care of your appearance
People with lower self esteem often stop making an effort believing there is no point. Taking care of your appearance is an act of self care, self love. Get a haircut, a new manicure or whatever that make you feel good about yourself.
5 Set realistic expectations of yourself
It is important to set realistic expectations to avoid disappointing yourself. Consciously think about how reasonable your goals are before striving for them and remembering that life in general is imperfect.
6 Build confidence by facing your fears
Start facing your fears one by one. It will boost your abilities and confidence. Write down all your fears and face them one at the time.
7 Stand up for yourself
You just can’t keep quiet when an unfair criticism is directed at you. Stand up for yourself, tell them what you are about now. You don’t have to accept everything everyone says to you as the truth.
8 Teach people how to treat you
People believe what you tell them, if you always project failure, inadequacy, lack of confidence , people will agree with you. Start changing the way you project yourself. Show up as someone whose opinions are just valid as others.
9 Don’t over commit
People with low self esteem often over commit and feel depressed when they struggle to cope. Try to be realistic about your workload. Don’t try to please everyone you are not an ice cream nor a cake. Learn to say no, learn to delegate. Only take on t work or projects you can actually do and commit to.
10 Stop thinking others are better than you
It is okay to admire people but don’t let that admiration turn into thinking that other people are better than you. There is room for everyone to shine and each of us shine at different time in life including you.
11 Stay away from troubling situations
Think about the time you have felt especially insecure or not worthy. Who were you with? What were you doing? What subject were being discussed? Notice people and situations that drain your energy and deflate your self esteem and avoid them. Set boundaries, move on from those toxic relationships.
12 Be proud of yourself
celebrate your successes and talk highly about yourself when you achieve something. be proud of yourself no matter how little progress you make. Look at yourself in the mirror and be proud of the person you see in front of you. Love yourself in a healthy way (Please read The bright and dark side of Loving Yourself)
Have you ever experienced low self esteem? How do you overcome low self esteem?
Till next Sunday